This is one of those posts I am going to preface with...I promise not to judge you if you don't judge me!
My five year old son still wets his bed...there I said it...I was VERY embarassed about this fact until I talked to a couple of other moms within the last couple of days who said their daughters still wet their beds.
So, I go to get my son out of bed this morning and he is soaked! Yes, soaked and he is wearing a Pull Up. Yes...a Pull Up. Why does he need a Pull Up and why am I embarassed to send him on sleepovers? Why, when I am hearing more and more from other people that their child wets the bed as well.
Now, why would I tell you not to judge me? Because I blame myself! Yup...you read right...myself! No, not because I feel mommy guilt or take my children's problems and make them my own, but because it really is my fault. When we were potty training my son, who I will call Luigi (after his favorite character), I was pregnant. After getting up two to three times in the middle of the night to a boy screaming because he was soaking wet and uncomfortable, I thought...that's enough! I'm sick of waking up in the middle of the night. I'm sick of washing and rewashing his sheets about 10 times in a week. I need my rest...I have a baby growing inside of me and I'll be no good with no sleep and no patience in the morning. So, I cut corners. My husband and I talked it over and decided, let's have him wear a Pull Up...he'll eventually grow out of it and it will be fine...
Well, let's face it...three years later and he's still wetting the bed...obviously, one of those last steps didn't work. So, I asked the doctor at one of our last appointments. He was so sweet (he's retiring in the summer and I couldn't be more disappointed!) and so...honest! He said, "You are going to have to repotty train him at night. By putting that Pull-Up on him every night, YOU told him it was okay for him to continue to wet the bed." My eyes welled up and I felt instant guilt for my son's embarassment. But, in reality, I shouldn't call it his embarassment because he doesn't think anything of it, really. We don't treat it like a big deal...because it's not. It's a fact of life...it happens. We all have accidents in our lives (after having four kids, let me be honest and say I don't know what bladder control feels like anymore!). I know that there could be some serious underlying medical conditions causing him to wet his bed and we will consider those options after we try the obvious solution...trying to naturally potty train him at night. One such condition that I worry about, but he shows no other symptoms of, is diabetes (it runs in my family). But, we will take this one step at a time for now.
Whew! I feel better now...a huge weight lifted off my chest. Thanks for reading and not judging me. We all make mistakes as parents. What I am hoping to accomplish with sharing my stories with you is a sense of unity. A sense of togetherness and a feeling that we aren't alone with our crazy mommy stories. Feel free to comment below and tell me some of your "Mama Confessions." Don't be harsh and, please, I ask that you not judge (as hard as that may be). That's not what this is about. I want people to share, openly and honestly, without worrying about backlash. No one is perfect.
Admitting our mistakes is what, I believe, separates the "goods" from the "greats."
"There is no way to be a perfect mother, and a million ways to be a good one." ~Jill Churchill
*Please support this site by using the links provided. *
My five year old son still wets his bed...there I said it...I was VERY embarassed about this fact until I talked to a couple of other moms within the last couple of days who said their daughters still wet their beds.
So, I go to get my son out of bed this morning and he is soaked! Yes, soaked and he is wearing a Pull Up. Yes...a Pull Up. Why does he need a Pull Up and why am I embarassed to send him on sleepovers? Why, when I am hearing more and more from other people that their child wets the bed as well.
Now, why would I tell you not to judge me? Because I blame myself! Yup...you read right...myself! No, not because I feel mommy guilt or take my children's problems and make them my own, but because it really is my fault. When we were potty training my son, who I will call Luigi (after his favorite character), I was pregnant. After getting up two to three times in the middle of the night to a boy screaming because he was soaking wet and uncomfortable, I thought...that's enough! I'm sick of waking up in the middle of the night. I'm sick of washing and rewashing his sheets about 10 times in a week. I need my rest...I have a baby growing inside of me and I'll be no good with no sleep and no patience in the morning. So, I cut corners. My husband and I talked it over and decided, let's have him wear a Pull Up...he'll eventually grow out of it and it will be fine...
Well, let's face it...three years later and he's still wetting the bed...obviously, one of those last steps didn't work. So, I asked the doctor at one of our last appointments. He was so sweet (he's retiring in the summer and I couldn't be more disappointed!) and so...honest! He said, "You are going to have to repotty train him at night. By putting that Pull-Up on him every night, YOU told him it was okay for him to continue to wet the bed." My eyes welled up and I felt instant guilt for my son's embarassment. But, in reality, I shouldn't call it his embarassment because he doesn't think anything of it, really. We don't treat it like a big deal...because it's not. It's a fact of life...it happens. We all have accidents in our lives (after having four kids, let me be honest and say I don't know what bladder control feels like anymore!). I know that there could be some serious underlying medical conditions causing him to wet his bed and we will consider those options after we try the obvious solution...trying to naturally potty train him at night. One such condition that I worry about, but he shows no other symptoms of, is diabetes (it runs in my family). But, we will take this one step at a time for now.
Whew! I feel better now...a huge weight lifted off my chest. Thanks for reading and not judging me. We all make mistakes as parents. What I am hoping to accomplish with sharing my stories with you is a sense of unity. A sense of togetherness and a feeling that we aren't alone with our crazy mommy stories. Feel free to comment below and tell me some of your "Mama Confessions." Don't be harsh and, please, I ask that you not judge (as hard as that may be). That's not what this is about. I want people to share, openly and honestly, without worrying about backlash. No one is perfect.
Admitting our mistakes is what, I believe, separates the "goods" from the "greats."
"There is no way to be a perfect mother, and a million ways to be a good one." ~Jill Churchill
*Please support this site by using the links provided. *
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5 comments:
It is always nice to hear that no one is perfect. I have to say there is a to I do wrong that I blame myself for. You have to do what is best for you and like they say he won't be doing it when he starts dating :)
JM
There is another mother out there who isn't perfect? My prayers have been answered. Thank you so much, Milwaukee Mommy. I have been having issues potty training my 4 year old, and have been hesitant to talk to anybody about it. I, like you, was pregnant when I really started potty training, and sort of just gave up. It was too much with so much going on. I would work on it, then stop, then work on it, then stop. Vicious circle. After the baby was born, how was I supposed to keep up? It was just easier to keep him in diapers. I'm working slowly at a routine, though. I wish you the best and keep my fingers crossed for you. LET US KNOW HOW IT GOES FOR YOU!
AW
Stop beating yourself up, you made a mistake, as parents we all do! Do as the doc says and try the re-training first. Remember to not give Luigi ;) fluids about 2 hours before bed time, if you must remember to have him try to potty before going to bed. You'll get through this. And Just as AW stated you are not the only mom who has had this issue, and I am sure you won't be the last! Stay Postive! Good Luck!
LE
LE makes a good point. Restrict the fluids, and make sure he goes before bed. I found it useful when I was potty training my little ones to wake them up before I went to bed to make them try to potty. It's disruptive to their sleep schedule, but it makes them aware of their bodies "potty schedule".
KM
Oh goodness. This is what I get to look forward to when I have babies? Potty training, accidents, stumbles, falls, questioning my sanity, having others question my sanity? I cannot wait. From what I hear the tradeoff is wonderful. Keep the stories coming! It's nice to know that my stumbles won't be in vain, and I won't be the only one! If I know what to expect, it may make me feel less...inept. It sounds scary, but it's nice to know I won't be alone.
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